45 people ive made sad, hurt. 45 people that are disgusted at me, think bad of me.  
yknow i like to think catto is my greatest friend, but why? because he's the only one i cant hurt with my words. only thing i havent hurt are things that i cant hurt  
i feel bad. for people around me, for people who had to see my toxicity that is just out of me. they didnt deserve to be hurt.  
yknow, in a way im happy they're gone. if i have noone around me noone can be hurt  
remember what i said about chainsaw man? i feel like im falling into that deep pit  
im gonna be as disgusting as those incels, ill be useless, a disappointment to everyone  
nea, you're probably not reading this but im sorry.  
  

damn, now im suicidal again, fuck this shit

-- echo (not zak), 2022   
ps: why am i even writing the date? its public in the commits